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What’s it like to be MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way)?
I very much am a MGTOW man. For me it’s more freedom than I’ve experienced in decades. I love it. I can now shape my life in any way I please. I do what I want, when I want to do it and I don’t need anyone else’s approval. And while I’m doing whatever I want, I don’t need to be bombarded with phone calls asking where the hell I am and when will I be home. I don’t need to check in and, if I decide to stay out longer, I can do so without any further concern for anyone’s wants other than mine.
Also, since I am choosing to live without any women in my life, obviously I have given up on having sex with them. This is, of course, the one real down side to being MGTOW. But it actually has its own hidden good points. For example, I am no longer manipulated some woman who feels that I will grovel and do her bidding just because she hints that I might get some sex. Sex is no longer an effective weapon. I can no longer be tempted by something I know that I’m not going to get anyway.
In addition to that, I no longer feel pressured in any way to seek any other form of female approval. If I am sitting alone on a bus and there are no seats available, I do not feel the need to offer my seat to some pretty girl that gets on the bus at a later stop. She can keep standing as far as I’m concerned. By the same token, I no longer feel any pressure to be some woman’s hero when she needs someone to do something for her such as killing a spider, lifting a box to put on the self or changing a tire. I tell her to get her equal ass over there and do it herself. This actually becomes easier and easier to do when you realize that you’re only going to be friendzoned anyway. Here is an example:
A while back, I was taking four brake drums to an auto parts store to have them turned. They were trailer brakes and they were heavy. The girl that was waiting on me brought a cart from the store out to the back of my truck so that we could take these heavy drums inside. I moved two of the brake drums while she moved the other two. Needless to say, I moved them with ease while she struggled. On the way back into the store, the cart got hung up on the threshold of the door. In addition to myself, there were probably ten other guys standing around either getting waited on or waiting their turns and we were all watching this girl struggle with the cart in the doorway. No one moved to help her. The girl couldn’t lift the cart high enough to get the wheels over the threshold and finally, she made some snide remark about there being no gentleman to help her. I said to her: “Well, it is called equal pay for equal work, cupcake. What were you expecting when you took a job at an autoparts store that traditionally has always been a man’s job?”
Point made.
Here is a GREAT advantage to being MGTOW. I am no longer obligated in any way, to provide a roof over some woman’s head. I do not need to buy a woman a home, work hard to pay for it, then have her decorate it any way she wants and have her shove me off into the garage or basement by calling that space my “man cave.” My entire home is my man cave.
What’s it like to be Forever Alone?
I’m 39 gonna be 40 in the coming year and all I had was a single month relationship throughout my life. At first I felt that I was a cripple trying to run without legs when it comes to attracting girls. I had plenty of female friends yet being friend zoned was a certainty. They all told me I was handsome but of course hearing that and yet not being handsome enough for them told me in my head that was just a pity story for them. I held no apathy towards them..I just accepted that it,s just nature’s way of selection of attraction and I was not meant for selection.
Years later it turned into a hatred…a growing seed of emptyness where I had a dim view on not just women but the whole game of dating and it gave me a perspective seeing from afar hanging with friends. Seeing how superficial pick ups were, how girls would go out with the “jerk” so to speak. How a single word or gesture in the first seconds of your life will determine if she likes you or not. In the end I felt being judged every second when I was being sincere. My openness towed caring for another was threatened by the very girls that I wanted to share with. Agian..I felt the laws of natural selection playing it’s game.
Later in the years it came to experience..or the lack of. I was already being generalized as some sort of creep or loser the second I told them i am a virgin in my late twenties. I guess one night it hit me…i didn’t want to be hateful for the rest of my life. I was able to see my lack of skill of talking to girls was creeping into a depression or more accurately I felt I was going through a withdrawal of a addictive drug but without the benefits. I guess I wanted to turn my single status and turned into a weapon against my hatred and unhealthy obsession for finding love that I have seen cripple others in the same situation as me. I wanted revenge and live a positive life and free of the addiction that made me feel so lonely the last decades. Looking back I felt I have gone through an emotional battle accepting the truth. I am not part of the natural selection process..love is blind ..so it will never find me. I felt I let go a poisonous part of my life…i feel free..I do get a little stab in my heart ..a little bit of emotion crawls out and tries to lie to me that I still have a chance of findinging someone…then I remind myself of all the superficial bullshit people who never been in my situation..and here their rose colored fairy tales of how easy it is. Those ignorant empty words give me strength ..no a challenge to stay single. Because there are more of me who are in the same situation..and we are growing. Intimacy is the most foreign concept to me…except knowing that it has no logic to it as all emotions do. It can inspire and also destroy…love dwaldles on both good and evil taking no true accountability but only taking credit for the successes and leaves the room when someone fails at it. The risks are great..that is no mystery to me. We all take risks..for me I feel I’m taking a bigger risk…but I know the reward of self sustained emotinal positive life is a absolution rather throwing for heart to a girl who is fickle with her emotions. (Men of course are are capable of this as well.). When my years of absence of another become more then the years ahead a question grew inside me…but I guess it was always there….”Why is love such a big deal?”. Love is just an emotion..a perk so to speak but not a right..like driving….just because you deserve love does not mean love will come to you and even if you work hard at it it’s not a absolution. If it was Every single person on earth will be paired up and that is a fairy tale believed only by the true naïve. Love is not for everyone..cause not everyone finds it. Because I did not find it should I suffer further looking for it? Should I listen to people who never been in my situation who have the audacity to force false hope upon me? Thats one way to stay single forever.
What’s It Like To Be A Sugar-Daddy?
Most people who hear about older men paying for the loving of a younger woman assume it’s prostitution, or at least prostitution lite. Because you’re essentially paying for sex. What’s the difference?
Well, I’m not picking a girl up off the street. It’s not like I’m getting a street hooker. I suppose there could be a fine line. But I see these girls, I get to know them, and I do things financially for them. If I was married, I would probably do the same. I’m seeing a girl who needs stability, and I’m helping her out. Although if there wasn’t sex involved, would I do it? Probably not.
When did you become a sugar daddy? Was there a certain point in your life when you decided that relationships were getting too complicated?
Probably three years ago. Maybe longer. And it really does simplify things, and it takes the stresses and strains out of it. Because if I was in a normal relationship, there are more things to think about. With this, I know what the deal is. The girls know why I’m with them.
Who initiates that relationship? Does she come to you, or do you approach her?
Since I’ve been going about it online, I’ve gone into complete Internet mode. Women do expect the guy to make the move—just like in a bar, the girls rarely come up to the guy—so I have my own method of how I use the site. (He uses sugardaddie.com.) I make the initial move.
And then on that first date, is there haggling about price? Or are you just like, “This is the salary. Take it or leave it?”
There are a couple of girls I’m seeing at the moment, and what it boils down to is that obviously we both know why we’re on the site. But it varies. Some girls are really comfortable with asking for certain things.
In fact, you always know when you meet a seasoned veteran, because I’ve met girls who have mentioned nothing about an allowance, and others do so immediately. One particular girl I am seeing, I give her $1,000 every time I see her. Sometimes I walk away thinking, “What the hell am I doing? Why did I just do that?”
But something about these younger women makes you feel like they’re worth that kind of cash. What is it? What qualities are attractive to you?
I’m looking for younger women. I tend to like girls in their mid 20s. Maybe it does do something for my psyche when I’ve got a young hot girl on my arm.
Once I meet a girl for the first time, I immediately know if I want to pursue it or not. Because of my intuition. You’ve been on dates, I’m sure, where you’ve thought, “Oh God. I want to get out of here.” We all have. I’m no exception. I have met some really beautiful women, but there just wasn’t anything there.
Would you ever fire a girl?
If she came to me saying she wanted more, I’d have to let her go. With one girl recently, I felt like she was trying to take advantage of me, and she pushed, pushed, pushed for more, more, more. And I was tired of her. Not the sex, I was just tired with the set up. So I didn’t fire her, but I just stopped contacting her, and I blocked her number.
Do you go on dates, or is it all about the end game?
It varies, but usually, really, it is not a social thing. We don’t go out. I found that strange in the beginning, but I’ve become accustomed to that now. It is what it is, we are not going to bother going out.
Have you ever found yourself falling in love with one of the sugar babies?
I’ve thought I was in love, but then I came to my senses and I realized it was just lust. I’m not some kind of sex machine where I have to have sex all the time. It’s just that once it was over, I realized it was the lust side that was keeping me in the relationship.
What are the ground rules? If you’re providing a generous amount of money to a girl, does that mean she’s at your beck and call?
No, unfortunately. Everything is pre-planned. There is no spontaneity at all.
So how often do you see her, then? And do you text or talk between dates?
I see each girl about two or three times a month. But there isn’t a lot of communication when we are not together. I found that very awkward at the beginning. When I do see a girl, I connect with her. But I’ve been in normal relationships where you wonder what she’s thinking, you wonder if she got that text message. These girls eliminate all that because the only text I get is, “Do you want to come over?”
Let’s do some math. If you pay each girl $1000 for visit, and you’re seeing them on average three times a month, that comes to $36,000 a year. And you’re seeing a few girls at once, so it’s costing you around $70,000 a year.
God. Wow. It really adds up, right? I don’t tell my accountant that. And that would just be the minimal side of it, without taking them out and flying them in and all the other expenses. It could really rack up. I hate to think this, but it’s probably about $100,000.
But I don’t see this as a vice or addiction. It’s just a way of socializing. I haven’t got a chart up on the wall of all the girls I’ve met, I just sort of pursue what I can and then move on.
If it wasn’t for the sugar daddy websites, would you be stuck dating women your own age?
Possibly. But hopefully not. Put it this way, when I’m out with these girls, it wouldn’t be that scenario of someone looking at me and thinking, “She’s only with him for the money.” You know those situations, where you think, “That guy’s either got a ton of money or a ton of something else.” I hope nobody looks at me and thinks that.
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