1. I would usually wake up around 6 am to the sound of my dad getting ready for work, and I’d go throw up in my bathroom. If I threw up or pissed the bed I would usually have a garbage bag in the room to throw my sheet in so I could take care of it later. This only happened a few times but it got more and more frequent. Usually the vomit was dark black, goopy, and extremely acidic. I found out later it was blood.

I had a constant supply of tums that I would eat from. I would then drink a bottle of water, a hit from the bong to reduce nausea, and some valium to stop myself from shaking. I would then wake up at around noon and take more valium to stop shaking. I would usually sleep until about 2 or 3pm, sometimes up until 6pm. Once I woke I would take a few shots of captain morgan to keep the constant body high going, and depending on how much weed or valium I had I would try and make some calls to get some more. Around 7pm before my mother left for work I would go through her meds to find Klonopin and Ambien that I could take later in the evening. I was ALWAYS thinking ahead – because I liked to be completely fucked up by around 11pm. She took a quarter of a 10mg of ambien to sleep, and I would usually take about half of her bottle over the month (Between 20 to 60 depending on the script). Denial.

If I wasn’t hanging out with friends that night I would be on the computer all night or with my girlfriend getting wasted and popping valium. Each valium was 10mg and I’d usually take around 20 per day. Eventually I would get really nauseous because I forget to eat, or just took too much, and I’d have to smoke weed and eat more tums. If I didn’t want to stop drinking at this point I would purposefully push the contents of my stomach up and I would vomit violently, and then continue drinking. By the time it was all winding down I would take up to 40mg of ambien. At the time I liked to tell myself this was to sleep, but I always stayed up and drank with it in order to gain more of a body high/psychedelic experience. Usually by this point my girlfriend would be passed out, and I would just be on the computer. Many of these nights I spent crying from 2 am to 5am, either when my dad would wake up and he could console me, or my girlfriend woke up. Needless to say those two and my substances were my only coping mechanisms. Many times my father would come check on me to make sure I was okay every morning.

This was my routine for 3 years until right around age 22. The only thing I have left that reminds me of it is a bald spot of cement on my floor where my black vomit destroyed the carpet, so we had to cut it out. When we got new carpet (they did this when I was in rehab) they left that cut out. Every morning my feet touch the cold reality of the world, and I am ever so grateful that I am alive. Sorry this was long winded. I had a hiccup last night after two years of sobriety and this was really perfect timing for me to write.

2. Wake up dopesick at about 8-9 am. Shoot up heroin in the bathroom with the shower running so room mates didn’t know what I was up to. Often mixed in meth/coke for the energy boost.

I would then get ready and drive to work as a salesman for a major cell phone retailer. Shoot up again in the car before I walked in the door. Many days I would steal iPhones or galaxy s3 phones and pawn them to stay high. It’s a miracle they can’t prove it and just withheld my last paycheck, or I would be in prison today for theft over $20k.

I would also call my parents and make up reasons I needed money, and sometimes just steal shit from people’s garages. I sold everything I owned, including my own phone and computer.

I had to, if I did less than a gram of heroin a day I got sick. To actually get high I had to mix in Xanax or alcohol or meth or coke. Another party of my routine was contemplating suicide. Usually thinking about driving off a bridge on the highway.

I shot up everything except alcohol and Xanax, cause there’s no reason to do so for those. I shot up about 7-9 times a day.

3. Wake up. Hit snooze. Hit snooze at least 3 more times. Brush teeth, outside for a smoke, and hit the shower. Groan under the hot water for at least 15 minutes, trying to burn some of the hangover away.

Drive to work, right in between half-pissed and hung-over, praying I don’t get pulled over. Grab a takeout coffee so big I can swim laps in it. Stumble into work and hope nobody notices.

Somehow make it through the day, and since I didn’t bring lunch, grab a slice or a sub for lunch. Now the work day is done, and it’s time to head home.

Inventory the smokes. Are there enough for the night? Try to remember if there’s enough ice and mix. Maybe pick up a bag of chips or something when I get more smokes. Stop at the liquor store and pick up a 375ml bottle of whatever, and 3 or 4 500ml beers.

Ah, now I’m home. Crack the first beer, and use it to chase a solid shot of the booze. There’s a nice glow, good. Wait 10 or 15 minutes until for the warmth to spread before the first bowl of the night. Fire up the computer.

Take off my clothes, and throw them on the pile on the floor. Put on my tattered robe from better days, and then grab the least dirty glass from the massive pile in the sink. Sit in front of the comp, in my underwear, bathrobe and socks, drinking, and smoking the night away. Maybe make a phone call. Maybe have a wank. Once in a while, score some lines, or an Oxy, just to mix things up.

Toss the empty beer cans in the general direction of a trash can. Maybe empty the overflowing ashtray, but only if a lit butt put another burn mark in the table. Try not to miss the toilet when I piss. In fact, try to piss a little harder to scrub the freckles off the bowl.

Down that last shot, then stagger into the bedroom and flop down on sheets that haven’t been laundered in a month. Bam! Coma sleep.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat….for 30 years.

Picked up my 6-month chip last week. In those 6 months I have lost 40lbs, got a promotion, new clothes, new furniture, and this week I get a new car. I ended a toxic relationship, and have a great social life through the people I have met in AA. I’m not healed, but I’m healing, and I have a sense of optimism for the future that I haven’t felt in decades.

Relying on a molecule for your happiness is a lot like repeatedly hitting yourself in the forehead with a hammer. It feels really good when you stop.

4. Not a physical drug, but this was an average day in my life for about 12 years.

Wake up and slowly sit up. I couldn’t stand or sit up quickly because I would start to black out (I was orthostatic). I didn’t have to pee because I was so dehydrated. Feel hunger pains. They hurt but felt good. Weigh myself. Less than the previous day? Today was a good day. More than the previous day? Body, I hope you’re ready to be punished. I was hungry, so I’d eat a packet of oatmeal. Then I’d feel guilty, so I’d chug a can of soda and purge the oatmeal and soda. Go to work. I wouldn’t focus because I’d be thinking about what I ate the previous day, what my weight was that morning, what I was going to eat next, whether I was going to purge it, and where I was going to purge it. Go to class. I wouldn’t focus for the same reasons as above. Come home. Eat about 8-10 packages of frozen broccoli (purging it all as I went). While I was bingeing, I would reddit, Facebook, watch TV on my computer, etc. Maybe try to study during this time. Eventually pass out due to exhaustion. Or due to literally passing out and waking up on my bathroom floor with blood in the toilet. Wake up. Do the same.

5. I’m having a difficult time right now with alcohol. I’d estimate I’ve had a problem for five, maybe seven years or so, maybe more. I’ve managed to get two undergraduate degrees and a law degree despite this.

Anyway, after a failed business, I’m now living at home with my parents. Planning ahead, like others have said, is crucial.

I wake up anywhere between 11:00AM and 2:00PM and hope there’s something left over from last night because I usually don’t remember how much I drank before I passed out. If not, I go downstairs to see if my mom is around. If she left me a note saying when she’ll be back and I have time, I’ll immediately run out and get a “big” bottle of vodka (750 mL) because I can get that in without her there and it’s cheaper.

If she’s home or I don’t have time, I’ll go get two smaller bottles (375 mL) and tuck them into my knee-high dress socks under my jeans that I wear with my boots solely for that purpose. Literally bootlegging. Since I wear boot cut jeans, they’re not visible, so I can sneak them in. I’ll even sit on the sofa for a few minutes or so with her to “prove” I didn’t get anything while I was out.

Then comes the planning. If I have a small bottle and 1/3 of another, I know I’ll “make it through the night.” Sometimes I only buy one small bottle to try to cut down and end up in that horrible place between being properly drunk and sober and annoyed by that fact.

I did that today and I don’t know what’s going to happen later. I only have half of it left and I don’t feel fucked up enough. So what do I do? Do I go out for more? (I’m sure I can drive, but tomorrow is going to suck.) Do I chug it now and hope it works? (Risking a DUI later in the evening if it doesn’t.)

I’m trying to break the chain, but it’s become such a habit that I don’t know how I can. I goddamn promised myself today was the last day before I try to get my shit together tomorrow.

For me, it’s entirely reactionary. If I’m with friends having a good time, I drink like a normal person. If I’m depressed and in my own head, all bets are off.

6. I wake up, and the first thing I do is prep a shot. Like before I even think, I prep a shot. I take a deep breath. I tie off, just about an inch above where I’m planning to enter the vein. I release my breath and push the needle in, waiting to see that bright red sign that I’ve hit my mark. As soon as I get it, I remove the tie and push my liquid version of heaven into my arm…and blast off. That’s the best I’m going to feel all day, and I know it, so I savor it for a second. Then I go outside and smoke, and proceed to start my day.

I went to work. I got home, I went to meet my drug dealer, bought some more, and repeat.

It was a truly miserable existence. Working for money, to run out and spend every dime of it, for not enough junk.

7. When I was badly strung out (Opiate addict, polydrug abuser), it was wake up early because I was sick, either get high or scheme to get money. If I got high, I would flop back down and waste away time. If I needed to get high, I would frantically call my girl or my mother to get money. At best, someone had money for me (or someone needed drugs and I’d middleman), at worst I suffered for a bit until I pulled myself up and went to kick in some poor family’s door and take their jewelery, change jar, photo/video shit, laptops and assorted small things that rinsed well. Lots of time was spent driving a 100 mile round trip to an open air drug market. The rest was spent getting high or selling the drugs at huge profit so I could get the next batch (which was always smaller, since the money never got made back entirely). Occasionally an arrest, OD, or change of supplier would shift things a bit. Eventually prison.

Nowadays I’m going to the suboxone clinic 40 miles away once a week. Unfortunately, it’s in the closest open air drug zone. So I take someone’s clean urine, pass my screen and get my script. Then I go and spend every cent a few blocks away, drive home and furiously stick a needle in my arm until the typical $100-150 purchase is gone. Then I wait for the next appointment. I have no motivation to do much of anything. I have virtually no job experience at 25 years old, and a felony record. I live in isolation, having alienated 98% of the people I know. I constantly dream of getting high, and only go through the motions of living. I am a dead man at 25. This course of action will eventually kill me literally, but unless my heart pops from a fat blast of coke, it’ll likely be a long and slow fade away while juggling opiates.

8. I have been sober for a little over a year but will attempt to give an accurate story of my different stages if addiction.
It all started when they took OC (OxyContin) off the market. A few days before it happened my friend got his hands on about 500, 20 mg pills. I sold about 150-200 of them I took my profit and went up to Portland Oregon to buy some heroin to start selling. I started selling points for $15 which was cheaper than anyone else. So I started making some decent money. I would smoke and sell all day and go to bed around 5-6 am and wake up around noon. Depended on when i started getting calls or if I needed to head to Portland that day. I wasn’t selling huge amounts so I would pick up a quarter to half ounce each time I went up and I would make 2-3 trips a week. I had to supply heroin for me and my girlfriends addiction so I never moved past about a half ounce. Well this lasted about a year until I got pushed out of business. Someone paid the guy who was hooking me up to start cutting my shit and I didn’t know who else to go through. I also let people get in debt to me which was a bad idea. One kid owed me $2000 which was a ton of money to me. Times got tough after I stopped selling. Each day I would wake up around 10-12. If I had money then I would go and get some heroin since I would already be sick upon waking up. If I didn’t have them money then I would have to go sell some clothes or my electronics. I went through 2 TVs, 4 ps3s, a surround sound system, 4 iPods, 3 iPhones and a bunch of movies doing this. When I was selling I could only go 12 hours without using until I got sick but at this point it was 24 hours. I was not shooting up at this time. So this went on for about a year. It was fucking miserable!! I couldn’t enjoy my high anymore because I would constantly be thinking of how I could get more. It wasn’t about getting high anymore. It was about not being sick. So after about a year I was tired of this routine. I decided to get sober. I quit cold turkey and was able to stay away for 6-7 months. Then one day I got a call from my friend who was selling. He needed a ride to go pick up his stuff. I agreed and that’s what started me being his driver for about a year. He was shooting up so I decided to start. He would pick up about 6-10 ounces a week and a couple ounces of cocaine. I pretty much lived at his house going on huge binges. If I wasn’t at his place then I was at mine, sitting and waiting for him to call me so I could drive him and get some free dope. At the end of one binge I noticed my ankle starting to get sore. Within 2 days it has swelled to twice its normal size. I decided to go to the emergency room. When I got there I had a 103 degree fever along with my swollen ankle. I ended up having a nasty blood infection and had to be on I.V antibiotics for 3 days. One of the scariest times of my life but I was back to shooting up while the I.V was still in my arm. I remember doing shots of coke while driving on I-5 on the way to Portland. Shit got pretty bad. I got to the point of doing 4 point shots. To me that was a lot but to my friend it was nothing. He would do 1 gram shots like it was nothing. His arms were covered in black holes where he had missed shots of coke and heroin. So I drove him for about a year until I just couldn’t take it anymore. I asked my parents for help and was on a plane to Sierra Tucson treatment center the next day. I have now been sober for about 15 months. I hope this granted you a little insight in to the day of a drug addict.

Are GMOs Good or Bad? Genetic Engineering & Our Food

Puffer fish courtship — This never ceases to amaze me, waaait for it

Guy spends $1,000 to shoot almost every gun imaginable

Touring Nick Offerman’s Wood Shop

Louis Theroux – San Quentin Prison

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Heartbreaking Facts About Joseph Merrick, The Elephant Man – Ranker

Meet The Beautiful Army Vet Who Loves to Post Photos of Herself Posing With Badass Guns – Maxim

Sidepiece Showdown: The Most Notorious (Alleged) Celebrity Mistresses And Jumpoffs – Bossip

10 Forgotten Muscle Cars That Deserve to Be Restored – Leenks

Mike Flynn Offers to Testify in Exchange for Immunity – WSJ

53-Year-Old Actress Juliette Binoche Clearly Still Has The Goods – Mandatory

Sommer Ray Gets Nice And Wet – Yes Bitch

Girls you wish lived next door – Trending Views

Activists seeking to expose Planned Parenthood instead get nailed with 15 felony counts – Rare

EPA Chief Rejects His Own Agency’s Science, Chooses Not To Ban Insecticide – Newser

Becoming A Man Of True Grit – Chad Howse

True Detective’s Alexandra Daddario Just Did A Jaw Dropping Photoshoot – Pairade

9 Texas High School Football Players Arrested and Accused of Sodomizing Teammates With Coke Bottles and Bats – The Daily Beast

Lucie Jaid Is A InstaBabe You Should Know! – Hollywood Tuna

These girls are generous with the cleavage – Radass

Russia ‘actively involved’ in French election, warns US Senate intelligence chief – France24

Rita Ora Having Bikini Fun in Maldives! – G-Celeb

This Is Your Brain On Recreational Adderall – OMG Facts

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Long story short – about two years ago, I hated where I was in life. It was the recognition of these three ideas that kept me going and helped me to turn my life around. I should add that these ideas aren’t original, but things that I’ve come across during that time and paraphrased one way or another.

1. The human being is meant to bear the burden of 24 hours — no more, no less. If you live in the future, you will get anxious; if you live in the past, you will get depressed. Twenty four hours is all that you have to live in. Give up all the other burdens to the universe, to god, to your cat, to whatever – but the burdens of the past are not yours. The burdens of the future aren’t yours either. Let them go. The day is your material. It’s what’s in front of you, it’s the only thing that you have the power to change or to shape or to use. It’s your canvas. It’s your material. So use it well.

2. Happiness is not something you can pursue – but instead the byproduct of doing the right thing. We get so tripped up thinking that happiness is an end goal — and then get frustrated when it slips through our fingers. Instead, focus on whatever the right thing is – and happiness will follow. Feel like shit at the end of the day? Maybe it’s because you ate a tub of ice cream for dinner, forgot to call your mom back, blew off homework to play video games, etc. On the surface, those are all things that should make you “happy” – but I’ve found that when I’m feeling most depressed, its usually a factor of actions I either did or (more likely) did not do. If you’re passively waiting for happiness to wash over you like a wave — it’s not going to happen. Instead, take action, do whatever the “right thing” is, and that feeling of warmth and fulfillment will follow of its own accord.

3. The world’s idea of success is total shit. Don’t get sucked into it. On television, on the street, when talking with friends or family – it seems like everyone confuses the concept of rewards with success itself. Whether it’s money, fame, recognition, praise, sex, the rewards are not up to you — they are all dependent on someone else. Instead, think of success as sustained effort of will. It begins and ends with YOU, and no one else. Think of any fantasy or goal you may have — say you’ve always wanted to be a great artist. Imagine it. What does that look like? I guarantee you’re thinking about palling around in paris with beautiful women and having your art work admired in galleries and being given the nobel prize – basically you’re fantasizing about having been a great artist and not actually making the art. That way of thinking can totally mess you up because it once again puts the emphasis on passive recognition over active, sustained effort. The more you shift focus onto your own actions, the more you create sustained effort, and the more likely it is that the rewards will follow.

Lastly, as a bit of an addendum – it’s good to remember the difference between stopping and quitting. This helps me when I’m feeling a bit lost or down on myself — or during those times when I’ve just chucked these three ideas to the wind and sat on the couch all day instead. If you’ve ever strayed from what you feel you were supposed to do or who you were supposed to be – remember that everyone has to stop. Whatever it is we’re doing, whatever our grand ambitions are in life, we stop. We have to stop. We have to take a piss, or go to bed, or go on vacation, or we have a kid and not have much time to ourselves etc. But quitting is stopping without ever beginning again. So as long as you’re here, as long as you’re alive and pulling air through your lungs, you can begin again. And if you begin again, then you haven’t quit. So fucking begin again.

Hope this helps someone out there.

–  Jockobutters

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Genuine. Heartfelt. Real….Kentucky Players After Heartbreaking Loss To North Carolina

Cristiano Ronaldo is getting an airport named after him in his native Madeira Islands, and to commemorate the ceremony, a bust was unveiled of the Real Madrid star

Gonzaga basketball players and the news anchor who interviewed them….I know what all of you are thinking

Dad of the Year candidate at the Cavs vs Hornets game

First public appearance of Omer Asik after his unidentified disease that cause him to lose weight 

Routine ground ball to second base, but Bo Jackson is just too fast

310-pound pitcher and viral sensation Ben Ancheff wants to make it to the big leagues.

This is what Conor told José Aldo after the fight 

Arturo Gatti showing off how to block punches with your face

Footballer Mohammed Anas thanks wife and girlfriend in interview

Rugby player Sam Whitelock  6′ 8″ 269 llbs

Formula 1 Steering Wheel

Cornering speed of an F1 2017 car 

Woo! Ric Flair has officially been immortalized 

Vince McMahon is 71 years old! 

1 of 20,000 

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Then and now 

Stray Dog Always Brings A Gift To The Woman Who Feeds Him

Little lover kitten

Adorable little girl mistakes broken water heater for a robot 

The Good Man Who Broke Up A Fight Between Two Youths Is Honored By His City, Pays Tribute To His Mom

Sad momma dog, until she is reunited with her puppies!

WWE Star John Cena Makes A Fan’s Day After Wrestling Event

Dolphins watching a Human show 

Struggling with a marker 

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Casually Explained: Life Explained Like A Video Game

Girl proposes to boyfriend during Kiss Cam

One of the most badass trailers of all time: Alien

Teen Dream Phone

What Nice Men Don’t Say to Nice Women

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10 Horrifying Facts About America’s First Serial Killer – Leenks

15 More Things Women Absolutely Want In Bed – Maxim

Truths About Cheaters, As Told By Mistresses – Madame Noire

FBI releases 25 previously unseen photos from 9/11 attack at Pentagon – FBI

14 Companies That Have Been Around For Centuries That Are Still Open Today – Ranker

Hot Instagram Pictures Of Tianna Gregory – Lurk And Perv

Hot Russian Model Claims to Be the Real-Life “Natural” Barbie, We All Know She’s a Fraud – Radass

Russian hired 1,000 people to create anti-Clinton ‘fake news’ in key US states during election – Independent

The Climate Change Battle Through One Coal Miner’s Eyes – The Daily

Is Model Sophie Mudd The Next Emily Ratajkowski? – Mandatory

“In 2014, for the first time in recorded history, police in the United States seized more money and property through civil asset forfeiture than all burglars and thieves combined." – Rare

What It’s Like To Purchase A New Car When You’re Loaded – Jalopnik

Here’s a foolproof method to increase your Chipotle burrito size by 86 percent – AV Club

Shrooms Help Cancer Patients Overcome Anxiety and Depression – Tonic

Brooke Burke Went Back to the Beach in St. Barths – G-Celeb

Annet Reinen Would Make A Great Super Naughty Mail-Order Bride – Hollywood Tuna

Sleeping thug gets KNOCKED out while waiting for jail – Trending Views

Science Explains Why Having Sex With Your Ex Feels So Damn Good – Pairade

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Instagram

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How to overcome procrastination

They say “procrastination is the thief of time”, and we know that our time might just be the most precious resource we have in our life (you can’t get that shit back!). So when you procrastinate you are literally wasting your life. Procrastination is a habit however and all habits can be removed given the right tools. So here are 5 tips that you can use to remove procrastination from your life.

1. Motivate yourself to start for 5 minutes Often when we procrastinate it is just because of the initial inertia of starting. Our brain having created negative associations with the task will do anything to stop us from starting. The brain loves to take the path of least resistance, so you need to trick it by convincing yourself to start for 5 minutes. Once started it is much easier to keep going, this tip will fix 50% of peoples issues with procrastination.

2. Chunk it down We often make the task huge and daunting in our minds. Chunk that shit down, make it small and manageable. The smaller the task is the more manageable it is for the brain. Small tasks are easy for us to comply with. For example: •If you need to write a report, start by working on just the introduction •If you need to do your math homework, just focus on doing the first question •If you are editing a youtube video, just focus on recording the audio first Small is manageable, and what’s manageable gets done.

3. Check your thoughts Change your thoughts from thinking about the negatives of the task to the positives of the consequences of its completion. We often procrastinate because of the mental dialogue in our heads “I don’t wanna”, “this shits so boring”. Change your thoughts to focusing on the potential results of your success. Focus on the upside which might be •Getting one step closer to your goals •Possible job promotion if you do it right •Youtube video could go viral •High Distinction for doing all your work Your thoughts are often what impede action, change them to propel your action.

4. Change your environment Make everything you need for you to do the work available for you. If you need to do some work get you laptop on the desk and clear the room from distractions. If you need to read a book get it within eye shot. If you need to go for a run, have the running shoes next to your bed. Make it stupidly easy for you to do the work by changing your environment.

5. Reward yourself Have a reward for yourself that you will give to yourself only after completing the task. Human beings are influenced by incentives. What are yours? This will keep you motivated whilst doing the work to complete it. Anyway guys if you use these five tips I doubt that you will have procrastination as a habit. Make sure to check out the animated video here: WATCH THIS

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Yuki Nakai’s gogoplata from mount

Options from the armbar

Omoplata escape by Robson Moura

Marcelo’s Arm-Drag/Inside Trip

3 stages for finishing the triangle

Crazy scramble from local tournament

Damn!

Slick armbar set up by Bruno Malfacine

Garry Tonon vs Rousimar Palhares

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The Oldest Recorded Recipe (5,000 years old)

This is a recipe for Sumerian beer, dated to 3,000 BC. The beer is said to be very strong, with pieces of bread floating in it.

Before and after anorexia

What are the inner thoughts of a person suffering from Anoerxia?

I lost around 50 pounds in a bit less than 3 months at my worst, must have lost 60 pounds in total. It started very slowly, as I got used to everything, as I eliminates food. But once I got the hang of it, it got fast terrifyingly quick. I guess I had the predisposition, I can get sickeningly single minded with my purpose.

I have, however, wonderful parents who acted in time and while I was diagnosed with atypical anorexia, although my lowest Bmi was 17, I still had my period so never got diagnosed with anorexia nervosa in itself.

I don’t know how to qualify the way I viewed myself. Days I knew I was too thin and others where I viewed myself as in need of losing weight. Small things, skin roll when sitting, bloating, skin pinching, that made me obsessed over every ounce of fat.

I don’t think I viewed myself as fat or obese, necessarily. I was aware and unaware of being thin. I knew my ribs sticked, I knew I looked I’ll. But the need, the will, the absolute triumph I felt when my weight dropped trumped everything else. This feeling mattered more to me than the consequences, I felt important, I felt good and in control.

And seeing and feeling my ribs, my hip bone, having a thin waist line. It was both soothing and comforting. I craved the touch of my fingers over the bones. Seeing my weight go up even by a pound, was an experience so… Traumatic, each time. I felt like a failure, like a worthless pig who had no control over herself. Not eating, enduring the hunger was my quest for control back in a period where I felt I had very little of it. It felt empowering that I could control the most basic of instincts. I thought I was strong each time I ignored it. I genuinely thought myself better than other people, while being so so jealous. I was miserable, in a twisted form of happiness that just shattered over time.

And then, even when you realize you’re too thin, you can’t stop. The vanity of being thin is such a small part of the whole thing… It’s not about your appearance anymore. I did not care about what I looked like, what I felt like. I cared about what other saw in me and to the me of that time it was fat. It was ugly. It was bad, and awful, and I just projected myself. Every thought I had about myself I threw it on others and then comforted myself in believing I was a superior being who could ignore instincts. Oh how I envied them and hated them.

There’s nothing logical in this thinking process. It’s just the visceral desire of introducing control in your life. It’s like believing you can extinguish fire with oil and you keep repeating the process, completely unable to see how violent the inferno became. And you can only realize much too late that the fire you were confronting in front of you made a full circle, and you’re trapped. You want out, but you just have the oil in your hands to put it out, so you just make it brighter and stronger.

– Murderous_squirrel

 Scientists lit a hole filled with natural gas on fire in 1971, thinking it would burn for only a few days. The hole has been burning for the past 46 years and is called “The Door to Hell” 

The speech that would have been given if the moon landings failed

Rare footage of some extinct animals

A woman enjoys the Rijksmuseum one last time

Steve Aoki’s amazing studio

Man with severe Parkinson’s tries marijuana for the first time

National Library of China 

A map of all the pubs in the UK

An American badger has been captured burying the carcass of a cow – a previously unrecorded behavior (article)

“The ground serves as a way to keep the carcass cool, so it inhibits decomposition, so [the badgers] can feed upon it and totally monopolise that really important food source,” said Buechley.

Indeed, after completely burying the calf, the badger built a den next to it. “For about two weeks it hung out underground,” said Buechley. “Down there it has got this awesome food source.”

How to give a turtle an emergency C-Section

Stephen King standing at the gate of his house in Bangor, Maine

The Undertaker retires from WWE after nearly 27 years following Roman Reigns defeat….30 Minutes After Wrestlemania Ended

“My biggest worry in life, as far as wrestling is concerned, is that I’m in the ring and some father who watched me for years takes his son and he goes, ‘You know son, this is The Undertaker here; wow, I wish you could have seen him when…’

That means it’s time for me to hang it up.

Hopefully the guys that I work with, they would tell me, ‘You know what, Take’? You might need to think about something…’ You know? Because I would hate to know that anybody ever [held] back to protect me. Because that’s not what I’m about. I’ve made my money and I’ve done well and all that. Why I wrestle now is because I enjoy this.

As long as I can go out and I can hang with our top guys, I got no reason to leave.”

500 year old Wreckage of the Swedish Warship Mars (article)

The Mars sank on May 31, 1564, off the coast of a Swedish island called Öland. She came to rest on the seafloor tilted to her starboard, or right, side. Low levels of sediment, slow currents, brackish water, and the absence of a mollusk called a shipworm—responsible for breaking down wooden wrecks in other oceans in as little as five years—combined to keep the warship in remarkable condition.

Will Smith on Facebook: Lunch with my BFF’s… I missed my Uncle Phil today

You can now hang out in a replica of the bedroom from 2001: A Space Odyssey

Artist Simon Birch and architect Paul Kember have recreated the famous bedroom from Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey as part of a larger art project called The 14th Factory in the Lincoln Heights neighborhood of Los Angeles. Kember revealed that his uncles had worked on the actual set for Kubrick.

From the Instagram evidence, it looks as though you can walk around the bedroom, sit on the furniture, lay on the bed, etc. Check the 14th Factory website.

The Biggest Non-Government Employer in Each State

Cueva de los Cristales (Cave of Crystals), Mexico By Oscar Necoechea

The Secret of Success from the Perspective of the Rich, Middle Class & Poor

The post A Damn Fine Collection Of Fascinating Photos And Videos appeared first on Caveman Circus.

Taping His Fists Up And Threatening Shawn Michaels

The most infamous backstage story about Undertaker is always going to be the occasion he taped his fists up and threatened violence against Shawn Michaels.

Taker did this because he had got sick and tired of seeing Shawn mess around with WWF business. The Heartbreak Kid had pulled out of a planned loss to Bret Hart at WrestleMania 13 due to an injury (which some believe he faked), he later went on to ‘screw’ Bret Hart at Survivor Series 1997 in what was a shock to the entire locker room. By conspiring with Vince to change a result without his opposition knowing, Michaels had betrayed the entire locker room – Undertaker was legitimately furious.

When it came to WrestleMania 14 it was the turn of Steve Austin to get a run with the WWF title. Austin was the hottest thing going and a genuine shot for the WWF to become a financial success again. Would Michaels do the right thing and put the star over? Undertaker as locker room leader was taking no chances. He got in Michaels face and showed his fists, letting the egotistical star know that if he did anything other than put Austin over he would face the consequences.

The result went off without a hitch: Michaels lost to Austin clean and the most successful era in the business was started.

Meanwhile, Undertaker unwrapped his wrists and carried on with his business as normal.

Shawn Michaels’ take on this:

“Back then, Mark didn’t like me. But at no time has he ever claimed that he said anything to the face of Shawn Michaels, and that’s because he didn’t. Mark went to everybody and told them, ‘If this doesn’t go down the way it should, I’m going to have a big problem and Shawn is going to have a big problem. I’ll go over there and beat the heck out of him.’ But he never had to say anything to me. My whole intention at WrestleMania XIV was to drop the belt to Steve, but I was going to make everybody sweat it out and make them think I wasn’t. Obviously, I got that accomplished. That’s extremely unprofessional, but that’s exactly who I was and what I was doing.”

Jake Roberts recalls first meeting him.

“I was there when he first got in there in the WWE. He comes to me, and says, ‘Hey I hear you know where all the good strip joints are at…’ And I’m like, ‘In the world? Yes. I know them all.’ And he’s like, ‘Well, I’ll travel with you!’. I said, ‘Oh boy, why don’t you go back to playin’ basketball because you’re not gonna be able to hang with me…I’ll kill ya…’

And a few weeks later, he was in pretty bad shape with alcohol poisoning. (Laughs) Yeah, but it was a ‘chemical’ world, so I was cheating, man. He didn’t know it. I wasn’t gonna tell him! He rolled with me for quite a while. We’re great friends and I’d like to think that I helped him more. I think if you asked him he’d tell you that he learned a lot from me. I love the guy.”

Roberts said after Calaway’s alcohol poisoning he had to get his stomach pumped yet still wrestled that night! Apparently he didn’t even need his usual makeup to look white as a deadman.

This story rings very true as Calaway and Roberts did some great heel work together torturing The Ultimate Warrior.

The Undertaker’s Association With Porn Star Jenna Jameson

In her autobiography ‘How to make love like a porn star’, Jenna Jameson revealed that The Undertaker used to hang round with her when he was on the road in Las Vegas. Jameson was only 16 at the time and would watch on with shyness as the wrestling star visited the tattoo parlour she worked at. Supposedly they ended up hanging out and became good friends.

Jameson proved to be the perfect gullible mark for kayfabe. “Undertaker was one of the biggest WWF wrestlers at the time. He would put people in coffins and set them on fire in the ring. And the scary thing is, that character he played was not an act” she detailed in her book.

She goes on to reveal that The Undertaker was in fact scared of her and got creeped out by her hanging round the shop. Later on she talks about a time he came to one of her shows and chased off a guy who was trying to buy her a drink, “You can get me a shot of Jaeger and you can get yourself a shot of shut-the-fuck up,” he apparently barked at Jameson’s suitor.

The Deadman then tried to woo Jenna, telling her, “I’m going to kick your boyfriend’s ass and take you away with me.”

She recalls that “I knew he was serious. I ran upstairs and told Jordan we had to leave, because this guy was going to beat the fuck out of him and kidnap me. So I never saw him again.”

The time Undertaker choked out Kurt Angle for real:

Kurt Angle recounts an Undertaker story in his WWE autobiography ‘It’s true, it’s true’.

Angle had been playing around for weeks with Vince McMahon in a game where they would take the other man down by surprise. Much to the Chairman’s delight he had actually managed to score a takedown over Kurt and wouldn’t let it go – he reminded Angle of it on every occasion he could.

It was all good natured, but the Olympic gold medallist wanted revenge, he started to plot a surprise ‘play attack’ on the boss. The time to execute his own takedown came during a plane ride to Europe. Spotting the boss unaware, Kurt pounced on Vince like a cat… little did he know the can of worms he had opened. The Chairman spent the entirety of the rest of the plane ride waiting to jump Kurt back and eventually did in a takedown that spilled out into the aisle as a fun play fight.

One man who had been unaware of all of this was The Undertaker, who was literally a sleeping giant. The scuffle continued and Taker was awoke by the commotion, reacting with shock to what he thought was his boss getting beat up. He reacted the only way he naturally would – jumping on Kurt and applying a chokehold which was seconds away from putting the star to sleep!

Luckily Vince explained the situation before Angle’s lights went out and they all had a good laugh about it.

The Bone Street Krew:

Shawn Michaels’ ‘kliq’ was infamous for bullying other wrestlers and having Vince’s ear. Bret Hart and Bam Bam Bigelow are two of the many wrestlers who have spoken out about their tyranny.

Calaway formed his own backstage group called the Bone Street Krew. This was possibly made as more of a joke, in response to HBK’s posse, but it got serious enough that tattoos were involved! If you ever see ‘Taker’s abdomen you will clearly see the very large B.S.K Pride emblazoned proudly.

Members of this alternate group were Yokozuna, Godfather, Savio Vega, Crush, Paul Bearer, & Rikishi.

The group was more a bit of fun and camaraderie compared to the real power of the kliq. Undertaker was actually good friends with Kevin Nash, so it wasn’t like he was trying to rival the kliq or take a dig at them. This was just a fun way to send a message to the kliq that there were other things going on backstage in the WWF.

Ric Flair On The Undertaker:

“One of my best experiences in the WWE has been the opportunity to work with The Undertaker. I’ll never forget him asking me to work with him at Wrestlemania 18. I would have to say the honor was all mine.

There will never be another character like Taker…and he is as responsible as anyone for the company’s tremendous success.

When I wrestled him in Toronto, I hadn’t been in the ring much [at that time] and this is how cool he is…he knew I wanted to do the flip [over the turnbuckle] and he was going to give me a kick off the apron…but I missed it.

He walked back around the ring in character, picked me up, put me in the corner and he said, ‘Kid…can you make it this time?’ (Laughs) I said, ‘I’ll try!’ This time we nailed it.

I’ll never forget walking back through the curtain after that match and Jack Lanza said to me, ‘You old sonnova bitch…you can still go!’”

Chris Jericho On The Undertaker Being The Locker Room Leader

“I saw our head of security, Jimmy Tillis, backstage and gave him a major bollocking.

“Where the fuck were you? Did you see what happened out there? I got hit with a battery!! I’m not going back out there, you got that?? Nothing you can say is gonna make me go back out there, do you understand? You can’t make me, you can’t make me, you can’t make me!!”

Then I saw The Undertaker standing behind me.

“You’re not going back out there, huh?” he asked with a bemused look on his face.

“No!” I said, even though Taker was the locker room leader of the WWE and not someone you wanted to talk back to.

The big man intensified his glare. “You sure that’s the best idea?” he said, like a colossal Clint Eastwood.

Excerpt From: Chris Jericho. “The Best in the World.” *

The Rock tells an Undertaker story: 

“There was a very specific incident that demonstrated to me exactly what kind of a man the Undertaker is.

It was while I was teetering at the upper edge of the second tier, getting ready to leap to the top tier. The Rock was on the border of super-stardom, within a breath of reaching a level of success that only a handful of wrestlers attain.

The Undertaker, of course, was already there, and he was my opponent on this particular edition of Raw.

We were in Detroit, at Cobo Arena, and the decision had been made that I was going to win the match. So, in essence, my fate was in the hands of the Undertaker.

He had the opportunity, all by himself, to propel me to the next level…to reach down and pull me up alongside him. He also had the power to make me look mediocre.

The Undertaker would never deliberately go out and make someone look like complete shit, because he’s too much of a consummate professional. He’s too smart a businessman to do something like that, which is one reason he’s been so successful.

But he did have other options.

He could easily have said, ‘Have The Rock beat me via disqualification.’ He could have said, ‘Have The Rock hit me with a chair, knock me out cold.’ That way everyone would have said, ‘The Rock had to use a chair to beat the Undertaker.’ It was entirely up to him. All that had been determined was the outcome: The Rock would win, the Undertaker would lose. How we would arrive at that point was up to the Undertaker.

His decision was to put me over clean – one-two-three! – in the middle of the ring. Not only that, but he decided it would be best if the Undertaker was beaten by The Rock’s signature move, The Rock Bottom. That would ensure maximum exposure for The Rock and maximum entertainment for the crowd. It made me realize what a true professional this guy is.

I will never forget meeting the Undertaker before the match and saying, ‘Man, I just heard it’s going to be a clean finish. Are you comfortable with that? Are you sure you want to do that?’

He looked at me and said, without hesitation, ‘Absolutely. It’s your turn and it’s your time.’

Having grown up in the business, and having seen business conducted that way…and not conducted that way…I couldn’t help but be moved by such an impressive gesture. It really wasn’t possible for me to thank him enough, but I tried anyway.

‘Somewhere down the road I’ll have the opportunity to do the same for you,’ I said. ‘And I want you to know…I’ll do it in a heartbeat.’”

The post 8 Backstage Stories That Show How Much Of A Badass The Undertaker Really Is appeared first on Caveman Circus.

It’s no secret that testosterone is the holy grail of male hormones. Here’s how to boost your T-levels naturally and safely.

The power of testosterone is almost mythical, and no wonder; it can boost muscle and burn body fat in addition to a whole heap of other benefits, including improved mood, sleep, libido, energy, overall health, and quality of life. Unfortunately, most men experience a slow decline in testosterone after they hit the age of about 30, putting them at greater risk for heart disease, type 2 diabetes, obesity, low mineral density, impaired sexual function, reduced muscle mass, and diminished physical performance.

1. Exercise and Lift Weights

If you want to naturally boost testosterone and HGH then combining weight training with HIIT workouts (high intensity interval training). Go to the gym at least three days a week, ideally at least three days a week, and lift heavy weights. Lifting heavy weights 6–12 reps with larger muscle groups like your quadriceps, hamstrings, back, shoulders and chest will help your body pack on the maximum amount of muscle. Specifically, lifting at least 30 minutes up to as long as an hour or so can be very, very beneficial boost low testosterone levels.

In addition to weight training, combining this with interval training like burst training is the best overall combo to increase HGH. In fact, burst training has been proven to not only boost T-levels, it helps keeps your testosterone elevated and can prevent its decline. Burst training involves exercising at 90–100 percent of your maximum effort for a short interval in order to burn your body’s stored sugar (glycogen), followed by a period of low impact for recovery.

This causes your body to burn fat for the next 36 hours to replace your body’s vital energy stores. It addition to increasing your T-levels, it can help burn between 3–9 times more fat, lower your resting heart rate, lower blood pressure, keep your brain young by increasing circulation, and aids in detoxification by stimulating the lymphatic system.

2. Eat Healthy Fats

Add a lot of healthy fats in your diet. Most men with low testosterone consume too much junk food and too many carbohydrates. You have to get rid of those empty calories and load up on healthy fat.

A study published in the Journal of Steroid Biochemistry studied the effects of diet on serum sex hormones in healthy men. Results showed that when men decreased their healthy fat intake, serum concentrations of androstenedione, testosterone and free testosterone also decreased. This indicates you can add low testosterone to the list of low-fat diet risks.

There are three categories of healthy fat. Number one is healthy saturated fat. The truth about saturated fat is it’s actually good for you if it’s the proper kind. Healthy saturated fat is found in coconut oil and raw, fermented dairy products like goat milk kefir, yogurt, or raw goat or sheep milk cheese. However, avoid conventional dairy because it will actually damper your testosterone.

The other type of fat you need is healthy omega-3 fatty acids. Consuming benefit-rich salmon a couple times a week or adding a quality fish oil supplement is great. Flaxseeds, chia seeds and walnuts are also great for low testosterone as you get those omega-3s.

Finally, monounsaturated fats can be natural testosterone boosters. Consuming an avocado a day or some olive oil and almonds really helps get those healthy fats that can help you naturally boost your testosterone levels.

3. Get eight hours of sleep.

A lack of quality sleep can dramatically diminish the amount of testosterone your body produces, thereby reducing muscle growth and fat loss! Research has demonstrated that the amount of sleep you get is associated with morning testosterone levels. Researchers at the University of Chicago recorded the sleeping patterns of healthy men and found that participants’ testosterone levels increased the longer they slept.  I recommend 7-9 hours of sleep per night to optimize the testosterone response.

4. Relax like a pro.

Stress is a major driver of low T. Ultimately your adrenal hormones, thyroid hormones and sex hormones are all interconnected in a beautiful but complicated dance.

A stress-driven phenomenon called “cortisol steal” can lead to a hormone imbalance where the production of testosterone is decreased in favor of cortisol. Stress also increases the production of aromatase and 5-alpha-reductase, two enzymes that break down testosterone.

If you relax and breathe, meditate, do yoga or otherwise boost your parasympathetic nervous system, even for just 10 minutes a day, you give your hormone system a chance to reboot and rebalance, lowering cortisol and increasing testosterone.

5. Vitamin D

One of the most important nutrients that can help boost testosterone levels is vitamin D3. In 2011, the results of a study published in the journal Hormone and Metabolic Research announced that vitamin D supplementation boosts testosterone naturally in overweight men by up to 30 percent. This is pretty exciting because research has shown that vitamin D3 is also linked to helping to prevent and treat cancer!

If you have vitamin D deficiency symptoms, it will absolutely crush your testosterone levels. So you want to get out in the sun 20 to 30 minutes every day to detox your body with the sun and get that all-important vitamin D.

Any day that you don’t get 20 minutes of direct sunlight on your skin, you want to supplement with 5,000 IUs of vitamin D3. If you get your blood levels tested and you’re extremely low — below 50 IUs — you typically want to do 5,000 IUs twice a day for three months until you get those numbers up. You can do everything in the world, but if your vitamin D levels aren’t right, your testosterone levels will stay low.

A few other supplements that can help include adaptogenic herbs that lower cortisol, like ginseng. Ginseng benefits healthy testosterone levels. In fact, research from the University of Hong Kong unveiled that ginseng increased testosterone levels in rats, making it yet another natural testosterone booster.

6. Kick the Sugar Habit

If you want to normalize your hormone levels and naturally boost your testosterone, the first thing you need to do is kick the sugar habit immediately. It has been reported that the average American takes in 12 teaspoons of sugar a day (about two tons of sugar in a lifetime), and sugar has been linked to depleting T-levels in several ways.

According to the American Diabetes Association (ADA), for example, type II diabetics are twice as likely to develop low T-levels. Here’s how it works:

• When you eat a diet rich in processed grains and sugars, your blood glucose levels become chronically elevated.
• To help keep blood sugar levels from going haywire, your pancreas starts to work overtime to produce insulin, which helps transport the sugar from the bloodstream into your cells to be metabolized for energy.
• Ultimately, if your cells are exposed to insulin for extended periods, you develop insulin resistance, which causes type II diabetes.

Once diabetes develops your body isn’t able to produce the right levels of testosterone as it should, and the ADA recommends that diabetics get their T-levels checked by their doctor if they start to develop any of the symptoms that I mentioned above.

The post 6 Ways To Boost Your Testosterone Naturally appeared first on Caveman Circus.

John Cena proposes to his girlfriend at Wrestlemania

A hacker explains the best way to browse the internet now that our privacy is for sale

Woman Has An Epic Freak Out At A Santa Monica Restaurant! “I Want A Refund, I’m Being Sexually Harassed”

Beetlejuice – Day-o

Vladimir Putin’s Rise To Power

The post The Dumping Grounds appeared first on Caveman Circus.

The deep imagery of coal mining in the 1970s shows a lifestyle of peril and persistence – Timeline

30 Celebs Whose Ethnicities May Surprise You – Bossip

This Girl Is Unbelievably Flexible – Leenks

30 Things About Life I Wish I Had Known 10 Years Ago – Medium

Mario-Themed Bar Just Opened And It’s Every Geek’s Dream Come True – Linkiest

15 Great People Who Were Also Perverts – Ranker

The first images of the Russian subway bomber probably confirm the nation’s worst fears – Rare

The torture of Tokyo rush hour, up close and impersonal – Huck

Smile, It’s Bras Optional Monday! (45 Photos) – Radass

Gorgeous cast portraits from Tod Browning’s ‘Freaks’ (1932) – Dangerous Minds

Now That Nikki Bella Is Engaged, Let’s Celebrate With Her Hottest Photos Ever – Maxim

And Here We Have A Girl Getting Mountain Dew Poured Into Her Ass – Mandatory

Ariel Winter Sexily Doing a Smurfs Event – G-Celeb

Bella Hadid Knows How To Use Instagram – Hollywood Tuna

This White Dude Was a Boss in the Chinese Mafia – VICE

Boy, 14, Arrested in Facebook Live Rape No One Reported – Newser

43 Hot Instagram Pictures Of Busty Model Iryna Ivanova – Regretful Morning

FCC removes competition requirement from Charter-TWC merger conditions – The Verge

Cam Girlz – The True Lives of Women Who Pose Nude in Online Streams – Vimeo

The teacher you wish you had – Trending Views

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