When I walked in on my roommate jerking it
When I hear my 17 year-old sister talk about marrying her current bf and how they’re going to be together FOREVER
When you walk into my liquor store with a fake ID
When I’m with someone and they run into a friend but don’t introduce me
When I check my notes after a final
When I drop a pizza slice and it lands cheese side down
When my mom’s boyfriend talks about how much he hates my dog
Getting woken up with a blowjob
When my butt crack itches and I can’t scratch it without someone seeing
When someone uses the bathroom after I finish my Indian food evacuation
When I fail a test I actually studied for
When people tell me I should see a doctor
When the dentist said I had to get braces to fix my underbite
When I didn’t hear what you said for the third time
Stalking bikini pics on FB and accidentally liking a photo from 2007
Listening to Notorious BIG but my gf hates rap
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