When I accidentally liked a girl’s bikini picture from the “Hawaii 2009″ album

When someone asks to borrow my cell phone to make a call but then starts going through my texts

When I learned the Boston Marathon suspects are Muslim, after all

When i fall asleep on the bus and miss my stop

When I meet a morning person

When N.Korea ask for aid..

My GF’s reaction, when I suggested anal…

When I say something embarrassing to a crush

When someone tries to open their pack of gum discreetly and I see it

When my cat walks in on me masturbating

When I spend the day with my dog and he bolts to my wife the second he sees her

When I push the limits of a sexual joke, and everyone looks at me like “did he just go there?!”

Whenever ants get into my soda

When I check my wallet after a night out drinking

When I catch my brother eating my leftovers from Olive Garden

When the Subway worker adds too much sauce

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