My girlfriend when I climax too early during a BJ
After I told my girlfriend that she gained some weight after Easter
When I see my ex at a party and told me she made a mistake dumping me
When I was in college: “Sure, I’ll take your flyer.”
That unexpected graphic sex scene during a movie with your parents
My immediate reaction when I’m drunk and I hear anything resembling music
When I realize I chewed on a borrowed pen
When my dogs get too aggressive while they’re playing
Waking up alone after a recent breakup
As an American, watching the Koreas right now
How I feel immediately after fapping
Watching the beginning of “Up”
When I take a bite of something that is too hot
When people ask me what I’m planning to do with my Japanese language degree
When I think I can handle one more shot of tequila
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