When you nut but she keeps suckin
When my friend comes over with his crazy ex-girlfriend
When my wife asks me if the viagra has kicked in yet
When my wife suggests I make a second trip to the car for the bags
When my wife says she wants to have a baby
When I see my ex and she’s gotten super out of shape just like i knew she would because of her poor diet and lack of exercise
When the dead guy at a funeral didn’t tell anyone he had a twin and everyone sees his twin for the first time
When I’m in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me sits down and whispers “I hope you’re hungry today”
When I found out the bullied kid’s family is racist
When someone says ‘New Year, New Me’
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