Me arguing with God’s security to let me into heaven
When they can’t help but mention their love for Jesus Christ in their Tinder bio
When I restart the computer for the first time after installing my first SSD
When my coworkers with different political views start their thousandth discussion
When people tell me I need to smile more often
When im hammered as shit and my friend comes by with another round
When the cute little old lady in front of me at the grocery pulls out a check book
When your friend finally stands up to his controlling girlfriend
When someone gives me a sob story and asks for money
When you try pulling the hotel blanket from where it’s tucked
When I’m listening to music and a song comes on that use to be my alarm clock for years
When the fine chick in the group feeling my homeboy more than me, so I gotta show her his hairline
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