.

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Victim’s Father lunges at daughter’s killer in Courtroom

Jacob’s Ladder (full movie)

Comedian’s Takedown Of OkCupid Scammer Is Expertly Played

Man ignores museum rules, touches priceless Clock which falls from wall and smashes

Preacher Pilot: Full Episode Commercial-Free

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This Russian Couple Adopted An Orphaned Bear Over 23 Years Ago, And They Still Live Together Today – Ned Hardy

The 5 Craziest Things We Just Learned From Elon Musk – Maxim

There’s A New ‘Game Of Thrones’ Theory That’s Turning People Against Daenerys – Linkiest

Prince Died of Painkiller OD – Newser

Rihanna Hot in Barbados of the Day – Drunken Stepfather

Arianny Celeste Underwear Photos for Martin Murillo – G-Celeb

How Did Snapchat Beat Twitter? Face Swap – The Ringer

Girls of Instagram: Michele Maturo (45 Photos) – Radass

It’s Kim Kardashian’s Ass for the Hundredth Time – The Blemish

15 Struggles Only Overachievers Will Understand – Rant Lifestyle

42 Full Contact Pics of Ciara Price – Regretful Morning

In this post we stare at Kate Beckinsale’s sideboob – Celeb Slam

The 50 Most Watched Sporting Events in U.S. Television History – Gunaxin

Everything you love about Natalie Dormer all in one post – Bad Sentinel

Christopher McQuarrie Has Some Words for Fans Freaking Out About ‘Rogue One’ – Double Viking

10 Classy Women With Larger than Life Assets – Classy Bro

Smoking hot selfshot of the day (nsfw) – Ehowa

15 Mind-Blowing Celebrity-Animal Hybrids – World Wide Interweb

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Instagram

Snapchat: GabriellaLenzi

The post Hot Instagram Babe Of The Day: Gabriella Lanzi appeared first on Caveman Circus.

Jiu Jitsu legend Robson Moura takes on a Challenger Off the Street

Ben Askren teaches the Funk Roll

Invisible Jiu-Jitsu with Rickson Gracie

Crazy inverted triangle submission! 

Ambar from sit-up guard 

Fake Smash Pass Iminari Armbar

Korean Zombie rolling with Rener Gracie 

Erberth Santos goes Beast Mode on Bernardo Faria

Awesome back take from North South position

A couple dudes try to rob a woman in front of Jiu Jitsu school

The post A Tribute To The Art Of Jiu-Jitsu appeared first on Caveman Circus.

Best missed call ever

Returning a tear gas canister with a tennis racket 

Dizzy Gillespie’s cheeks while playing the trumpet

Statue of a polar bear impaled on a oil supply line, dumped infront of the danish parliament

When Rhode Island accidentally legalized prostitution, rape decreased sharply (article)

A nurse is looking for a vein on the hand of a premature baby

Exactly how much everything at McDonald’s costs to make. 

English Actress Daniella Westbrook’s nose after decade of cocaine usage

Kidney Stones under a microscope

Some dude had to pass this Kidney Stone out of his pee-hole…poor bastard

This is an Ashera breed of cat. They go for $22,000–$125,000 

The secret airplane bedrooms where flight attendants and pilots sleep on long-haul flights

This happened 27 years ago today 

The interior of the Mazda HR-X2 from 1993 

Sly and his daughters

Aerial view of a scrap tire dumpyard 

In Heyope Wales, 1989, there was a tire fire where 10 million tires burnt for at least 15 years! Once a tire fire has started it is very very difficult to put it out.

On April 2012 a five million tire fire erupted in Jahra, Kuwait

Welcome to Rio: Man gets pickpocketed while being stopped by police for theft

Size comparison of Thailand’s only aircraft carrier versus the USS Kitty Hawk 

A 44 year old Orangutan hand

This is what happens when you lose 200 lbs

Graduation pic of 18 female doctors at Jizan University, Saudi Arabia

Alessandro Moreschi was castrated early in his life to maintain his soprano voice. He is also the only castrato to be recorded at age 44 in 1902.

The post A Damn Fine Collection Of Fascinating Photos And Videos appeared first on Caveman Circus.

By Roger Aldridge

How do people die in motor “accidents”?

I’ll tell you.

Some people explode — like a thin plastic envelope full of offal which has been hurled against a brick wall. No pain.

They put them on a sheet of canvas and pick it up at the corners like, as one tow truck driver described it: “A tub of guts”

I haven’t seen one of these.

Others die intact. Ruptured inside, you understand, but un-harmed to look at. There may be a thin, trickle
of blood from an ear or nostril.

It annoys you, subconsciously … you wish they’d raise a dead hand and wipe it away.

Death is not instantaneous.

Rather, it comes in a matter of minutes. There is no pain as we know it … nothing sharp, exquisite, searing. It is an inner numbness, a bubbling frothing thing and a terrible inability to breathe.

They are winded, punched in the stomach by a ton of metal moving at 60 mph or more, shattering
every bone in the body as a fist would shatter a wine glass wrapped in a rug.

They never breathe again.

I’ve seen a number of these.

Men die with their trousers on, which somehow lends them dignity.

Women die with their legs apart in a lewd display.

Children die most horribly because they are seldom properly seated or braced. And they
are very small. They are thrown through jagged windscreens to roll and skid along road surfaces
as abrasive as cheese-graters.

Or, cradled in their mother’s laps, they are sandwiched between her and the unyielding dashboard. Mummy might just as well have jumped on the child from a third-storey window.

Without meaning to, of course.

Some people are burned to death.

They are not incinerated, as you’d imagine, but tend to bake or char.

Their clothes burn off them— if it is wool it forms a ghastly black”crackling”— and the skin bakes into quite a hard rind which makes a hollow sound if you tap it.

When the corpse is lifted from the wreckage it is as rigid as a papier mache dummy.

Often it is set in a sculpted, lifelike posture, but unnaturally stiff, like the little plastic drivers that toy manufacturers put in the front seats of model cars.

I’ve seen a couple of these, too.

I’ve seen men’s faces buried in the stringy bark of a tree trunk; fixed there, seemingly, by
a gob of sticky red gum.

And men hanging from halfopen car doors; fl ung rag dolls of men embracing steel power pylons; men skewered on steering columns; men whose faces are gone, as if nibbled by rats.

I’ve seen men survive.

Dragged from the back seat, soaked in a shandy of blood and beer, the shards of smashed bottles glinting in the frantic blue of the revolving police light.

Carried into casualty on a stretcher, hurt, frightened, shocked.

Men without dignity, crying while other men cut away their blood-soaked rags and yet other men explore abdomen and groin with fingers that feel like fence-posts.

Men blinking through blood and tears into bright lights while probes and tweezers remove chunks and slivers of glass from facial wounds — eyes, cheeks, gums — that big bit was a tooth. Two teeth, actually.
Having trouble talking.

Panic-stricken men with crushed rib-cages trying to breathe through broken bellows. Grey-faced, incoherent, being asked questions:

What’s your name? Are you married? Where do you live? Where does it hurt … here … here … does THAT hurt? Any children?

Thighs as flexible as a rolled-up towel, pushed back into shape and splinted. Men wheeled into the X-ray room and laid this way, then that while the ragged edges of a broken pelvic girdle scrape together. Got to get a good picture.

Men denied pain-killers while an eternity of assessment passes and other men pierce their arms and insert tubes and hold up little canisters of blood … blood donors love life, but butter eaters make better lovers.

Then sliding blissfully into euphoria as the pain-killing injection hits and they are wheeled into the operating theatre.

And I’ve seen men survive this, too.

The Russians were criticised in the 1930s for severing a dog’s head and keeping it clinically alive for a number of hours.

Alive enough to salivate at the smell of food.

I’ve seen men in the quadriplegic wards at the Austin Hospital and at Mont Park who might just as well not have bodies, although their heads are alive.

The unlucky ones are mentally unimpaired and strive for months and years to learn to write with a pencil held in their teeth, or to type by flicking one of the few remaining responsive muscles in their bodies.

Their intelligence is sharp, their appetite for books and learning is gargantuan, their role in life that of the eternal spectator … eternity being, in some cases, a “lif” expectancy of 50 or more years.

They make the best of it, but many wish for death.

And I’ve seen the lucky ones, those with brain damage, whose minds were shaken loose in the
cataclysm of car with car.

Men with glazed, half-lidded eyes, with neither bowel nor bladder control who sog in bed with no sensation below the shoulders so that bowel obstructions, appendicitis, bladder problems go undetected
by the normal warning systems which we know as pain.

Men whose total sexual impotence is parodied by an apparent state of constant sexual excitation.

Men who were mothers’ sons, wives’ husbands, girls’ lovers, children’s fathers. Men who recognise no one.

Or men whose eyes ignite for a brief moment with recognition, whose mouths open to speak a flubbery sound like deflating bubble gum, then sink exhausted into the pillow.

I’ve seen things that make me sick to the heart. I thought you should know.

The post A Sobering Reminder That Driving Around In A 4000 Pound Machine Should Not Be Taken So Lightly appeared first on Caveman Circus.

Muhammad Ali when they told him to participate on the Vietnam War

Psychic Gets caught lying then look stupid 

You’re Getting Fucked by College Textbooks

Keegan, from Key and Peele, gives some fascinating insight on how improv actors think

World War II justified by former German soldiers

The post The Dumping Grounds appeared first on Caveman Circus.

16 Photos Guaranteed To Put A Smile On Your Face – Ned Hardy

Jessica Alba: I Was Still A Virgin When I Posed For My First Maxim Cover Shoot – Maxim

John Oliver Buys $15M In Medical Debt, Then Forgives It – Newser

6 On-Set Mistakes That Led To The Greatest Movie Scenes Ever – Linkiest

Daniella Semaan And Her Huge Booty In A Bikini – G-Celeb

Report: Average Male 4,000% Less Effective In Fights Than They Imagine – The Onion

Ariel Winter Finds her Angles of the Day – Drunken Stepfather

All US Military Training Programs, Ranked by Difficulty – Ranker

Stanford Rapist’s Father Argues Son Only Got 20 Minutes of Action – The Blemish

This Girl Tried to Grill And Failed Epically (16 Photos) – Radass

New President of the Philippines Says Citizens Who Kill Drug Dealers Will Get Medals – VICE

40 Asstastic Instagram Pics of Cecibel Vogel – Regretful Morning

10 Hottest Photos of Playboy Model Shelby Chesnes – Classy Bro

It’s the Miss USA Bikini Prelims – Celeb Slam

The Funniest Live TV Tweets Ever (gallery) – World Wide Interweb

Reasons NOT to Move Near the Amish – Gunaxin

David Ayer Talks #SuicideSquadGoals and Audiences React to First Test Screenings – Double Viking

D-Day, Then and Now (38 Photos) – Suburban Men

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Instagram

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Police Brutality 

Spelling Bee was Lit

Man unfazed by charging Gorilla 

Zero fucks given

A look of disappointment 

Christopher Nolan shooting gravity scene of Inception (The Making Of Inception)

How to pick up your friend after they’ve had one too many

Ultimate relaxation 

Parenting done right

5’5″ highschooler dunks over 2 defenders

Just a man wrestling a tiger.

Testing his new bulletproof vest

And this is why you shouldn’t try this at home

Anti Smoking device

Fine, I’ll just drag your ass home

The post 14 Glorious Clips For Your Consideration appeared first on Caveman Circus.

A 98-year-old WWII veteran passes away with his wife by his side and dressed in his army uniform. This picture of Justus Belfield saluting was taken the day before he died

Mom and son took selfie aboard doomed Malaysia Airlines plane before takeoff

Woman sends a snapchat with her boyfriend and his gun before he shoots her dead

Gabriela Hernandez posted photo of herself on Facebook before committing suicide in 2013

Dave Hally took one last photo of his wife and 4-year-old daughter before takeoff for their dream vacation aboard MH17 

Last image of Rina Palenkova before committing suicide by train 

High school teacher Colleen Ritzer moments before her student raped and killed her

Canadian soldier posted this image to Facebook with the caption “Happiness is”, hours before stabbing his pregnant wife, throwing her off the balcony, and then jumping to his death

Mother posted picture of husband and daughter boarding Russian flight #7K9268, which crashed on 10/31/15 (caption read “We’re going home.”) 

Mark H. who just passed away. He was a victim of a driver who was drunk behind the wheel. He was expecting a child with his girlfriend.

Gilles Leclerc (left) and his girlfriend in Bataclan moments before the Paris shootings 

Russian teen seconds away from falling to his death.

Actress Sharon Tate in her backyard. Later that evening she and 4 others would be slaughtered by members of Charles Manson’s crime family. Los Angeles. Aug. 9, 1969

Japanese exchange student (in red) moments before losing her footing and being swept over Niagara Falls to her death

Officer Ashley Guindon of the Prince William Co. P.D. upon her swearing in Friday Feb. 26th. She was shot to death tonight during her first shift, Saturday Feb. 27th.

Last photo of a gay man being executed by ISIS by being thrown off a building. You can see another body below

Last image of “The Simpsons” co-creator Sam Simon 

January 28, 1986 – the crew of the Challenger on their way to board the shuttle…. 

Inside Japan Air Flight 123 during it’s final 30 minutes before crashing into a mountain side. Out of 524 passengers and crew only four survived (The Crash Of Japan Air Flight 123)

Heather Price, suicide victim’s final moments before she jumped off the Hoover Dam Bridge

Last photo of Muhammad Ali

The post Your Thoroughly Depressing Post Of The Day: 21 Haunting Last Photos Of People Before They Died appeared first on Caveman Circus.

What’s it like to live with Schizophrenia?

If you worked with me or saw me every day, you’d probably think I was a little eccentric—but you might not realize I am mentally ill. You’d notice that sometimes I have an odd way of saying things. Sometimes I get quiet. And sometimes I have bad days when it’s better to leave me alone.

I told my boss and a few close coworkers that I am bipolar because it affords me a bit of leeway with some of my slightly off behavior and my occasional need to call in sick. I never, ever tell people that I am schizophrenic, because they assume that (1) I have multiple personalities or (2) someday I will snap and try to attack them with a broken bottle. Both of which are completely ridiculous.

I think and process information very differently than you do. In my office, I am highly valued for my creative approaches to problems and situations and for my ability to detect patterns across large sets of data. My brain processes much more information than the average brain, and it is constantly at work seeking out and forming connections that the average person would never consider. But on some days, it feels as if someone has changed the rules of reality, and I am the only one who notices. Some days, I believe I have important information that other people aren’t aware of. Sometimes it is vital that I sit in a certain spot on the train or avoid milk because it’s part of an attempt to control my mind. Some days, I see, hear, or believe things that no one else does.

Some days, I feel that every thought in my head is broadcast to the people around me, so I have to be extra careful about what I think because I can’t let the people sitting nearby in the coffee shop find out my secrets. On other days, I pick up extra information about people and situations. I might be able to hear voices that explain what the lady behind me in line at the grocery store is really thinking about me. Most times, this extra perception just buzzes quietly in the back of my brain as I go through my day. Intense episodes happen infrequently.

Istarted having symptoms when I was 19. Since then, I’ve had to teach myself to always be the last person to react to things and to mistrust my own judgment and perceptions. Unique situations have to be run through an “Is this real?” test. I have to constantly live with the fear that the universe that I experience may not be the same as the universe that actually exists.

For example, a while ago, I was in a large meeting at work, and a bunch of lightning bugs began to fly around the room. Check 1: Is this possible? Answer: implausible but not impossible. Check 2: Is anyone else in the room reacting or commenting on the situation? Answer: No? Then I’ll assume it’s not real until I have evidence to the contrary.

I’ve also had to implement a three-day waiting period when I experience strong, unexpected emotions. For instance, one day, I was suddenly and utterly convinced that my boss hated me and was about to fire me. Check: Find external evidence that proves this belief. Answer: I looked through my e-mail and meeting notes and could not find anything that would have caused him to hate me. And no coworker volunteered any independent verification that there were problems. Response: I had to force myself to put these beliefs on the back burner and reexamine this emotion after three days. By the end of the waiting period, I was able to recognize that everything was fine.

Keep in mind that this process of checking and double-checking your surroundings is not something all schizophrenics are capable of doing, and it doesn’t work during bad episodes. After all, you’re running the reality test using the same faulty brain and false logic that’s telling you, say, that a room is full of lightning bugs. If you’re only mildly hallucinating, you can say to yourself, “This is probably not real.” If you’re experiencing full-on psychosis, you are probably also hearing the people in the room whispering about it behind your back.

Imagine turning on five television sets, full volume, tuned to five different channels, and tell me how easy it is to follow the thread of just one show. On one channel, a show called Reality has a dramatic situation playing out, and on another TV is a hilarious sitcom. Now try paying attention to the drama, keeping in mind that you absolutely must not laugh or react to any of the jokes in the sitcom. This illustrates the trouble I have paying attention on off days. I’m easily distracted.

On my worst days, I have trouble understanding and responding to people. I hear the words, but they don’t make any sense. I can’t get my brain to interpret them. If I’m feeling particularly overloaded, I just shut down and will barely talk to or respond to others. I take antipsychotic medication, but it’s expensive, and it slows me down. Because of the medication, I can’t think through complex problems as quickly as I once could, and I sleep several hours more each day and have gained 50 pounds, despite eating well and working out more.

I’m lucky to live with a remarkable, highly patient partner who tells me when I’ve gone out of bounds in my social behavior or personal appearance. And, thankfully, I have above-average intelligence and self-awareness. They help me recognize that hallucinations and delusions aren’t real and analyze what an appropriate reaction should be in most situations. Still, knowing this doesn’t make them go away.

– Anoynmous

What’s it like to be transgendered?

I am a woman. For this, I am called a liar.

I am not a liar.

To the edge and back

I’m transgender, meaning the gender that was assigned to me at birth doesn’t match the gender I identify with. For most of my life, I couldn’t articulate this feeling in a coherent way.

I started struggling when puberty hit, around age 12. I watched as my body turned what felt to me grotesquely masculine, and my mind began to feel as though it was in a fog of testosterone. My brain was like a Camry someone had tried to fuel with diesel — it wasn’t meant to run on testosterone. I wished I could be like the other girls in my class. Something just seemed right about who they were, how they were.

I sank into a depression that lasted for years. I didn’t understand why. I tried therapy, anti-depressants, anti-convulsants, and anti-anxiety medications. They didn’t help. I finally gave up trying to fix it. I thought there was nothing I could do.

At age 26, after years of repressing these feelings, the dissonance between my mind, body and life itself became too much to handle. Every morning I woke up feeling more shame and anxiety than ever before. I took up smoking, a habit I’d kicked nearly two years prior. I couldn’t sleep without drinking, and I often drank until I couldn’t walk. Still, the feelings persisted. I considered suicide.

Then in late May of 2012, I came out to my girlfriend of 5 years, pouring my heart out, doing the best I could to explain the toll that ignoring this has taken on me. It’s a hard thing to put into words.

By that October, after months of working with a therapist specializing in gender-related issues, I had begun hormone replacement therapy. Simple enough. I took medication to reduce the testosterone in my system, the very hormone that had nearly destroyed me, and I gave myself a weekly injection of estradiol, one of the more common forms of estrogen found in pubescent and post-pubescent women.

A few months later, I’d begun to experience the physical and mental impact of the hormones, and with it a new sense of clarity, peace and happiness. The chronic aches in my joints and pains in my stomach that had been a staple of my life since puberty dissipated. My mind and body began repairing themselves. It’s as though my brain was meant to run on estrogen my whole life.

But why?

Why am I like this? Honestly, I don’t know. There are a number of theories rooted in medicine, one of the most prominent being a 2006 study, published in the journal Psychoneuroendocrinology, by Schneider, Pickel and Stalla.

The study suggests that the amount of testosterone a fetus is exposed to in utero is directly linked to one’s likelihood of being transgender. In other words, prior to my birth, I may have been exposed to too much or too little testosterone while in my mother’s womb, causing my brain to develop differently than that of the average baby boy.

No matter the cause, this is, and has always been, a part of me. If I could have, I would have chosen to be born congruent, mind and body. I didn’t choose this, but I’m making the best of what I have.

I know who I am

I am a woman, but on such a frequent basis, I’m told this is not true. I’m told that I’m “genetically” or “biologically” male. I’m told that I’m not a “real woman.”

I have to ask: What constitutes a “real woman?”

How am I not one? Is it because of my chromosomes? I don’t think that’s fair, as neither you nor I know what my chromosomes even are. Someone who makes this argument assume they’re XY, but I don’t even know that for certain, as I’ve never had a karyotype test. It’s probably a safe bet that my detractor hasn’t had a karyotype test, either. Even if I do have a Y chromosome, that doesn’t mean anything. There are a number of women with Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, sometimes giving them an XY set of chromosomes, which, typically, would be associated with men. Are they not women? In fact, there was even a recent case of a woman with XYchromosomes who gave birth to a daughter with — you guessed it — XYchromosomes.

Additionally, a September 16, 2013 article in the New York Times (“DNA Double Take”) examines recent studies on the DNA of women. “In 2012, Canadian scientists performed autopsies on the brains of 59 women. They found neurons with Y chromosomes in 63 percent of them.” 63 percent!? Wow. A separate study, conducted at the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute in Boston, discovered that 56 percent of the women they investigated had a Y chromosome, based on a sample of their breast tissue. This goes to show that being a woman is about more than whether you have two X chromosomes.

Is the reason that some disqualify me from womanhood related to the fact that I can’t birth a child and don’t have a uterus? If so, do they also reject the womanhood of infertile women or those who have had a hysterectomy? It’s true that I wasn’t born with a uterus, but neither was Jaclyn Schultz, Miss Michigan 2013. As a result of Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser syndrome (MRKH), she was born perfectly healthy, with the exception of her missing uterus (which also resulted in an inability to menstruate). 75,000 women in the United States have MRKH. Are they “really men?”

Is it the fact that I wasn’t “socialized as a woman” that excludes me from womanhood? Is it that I was “socialized as a man”? Well, so were these girls in Afghanistan. They were “raised as boys” until they were well into their teenage years. Are they not women?

Let’s move on to the most obvious objection to my womanhood: It would take sexual reassignment surgery (SRS), also known as vaginoplasty, for me to ever have a vagina. So that “makes me a man”? Tell that to women born with vaginal agenesis, a condition present in 1 out of every 5,000 female infants, where a child is born without a fully-formed vagina. This condition may require surgical intervention (i.e. vaginoplasty) in order to create a vagina. Does this negate their femaleness as well?

None of these factors (chromosomes, reproductive organs, socialization, genitals) cancel out the fact that the girls and women I mentioned above are, in fact, girls and women. I sincerely doubt that most people would so much as question the womanhood of the women I described. After all, it’s not their fault that they were born with anomalies. How am I any different? I didn’t choose to be transgender.

I’m different, and I’m okay with that

I don’t want “special treatment,” I just want to be respected as a human being, as deserving of dignity as anyone else. I want to be able to exist in the world without the core of my identity, something that I grappled with for more than a quarter century, being dismissed by someone who couldn’t possibly understand what it’s like. I want to be able to go to work without worrying about being fired for who I am. I want to be able to use the restroom without fear of being beaten or accused of having malicious intentions. Like everyone else, I want the world to see me for me.

Is that really so much to ask, to be treated like everyone else, to have the same rights and protections as everyone else? From a legal and public accommodations viewpoint, that’s really all any of us are asking for.

Being transgender is a medical condition. Like so many other conditions, if left untreated, you’re bound to wind up the bearer of a host of related symptoms. Depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and actions are what you often get when you try to suppress your dysphoria. Without treatment, which, for me, came in the form of hormone replacement therapy, I might be dead.

I know who I am, what I am. I am a woman, and that’s the truth.

– Parker Molloy

What does it feel like to go from being wealthy to being poor?

The global financial crisis destroyed me in 2008. The years immediately after were some of the worst years of my life. I lost everything; or at least I thought I did.

As it turns out, I didn’t lose much at all (assuming you don’t count approximately $3 million in real estate equity and a couple of hundred thousand dollars in cash, as “much”).

I was in Vegas when Lehman Brothers folded… It was my birthday … and it was the first time I’d ever lost big there. I should have known something wicked was coming, but I didn’t. So when my consulting contract didn’t get renewed, I didn’t panic. I kept doing business as usual. When my tenants defaulted on rent, I kept paying mortgages. A year later, I still had $50,000 plus in the bank … enough of a cushion.

I suppose at this time I should make you aware that I was not exactly a low-profile person. I was (and am) in luxury goods and hospitality, and I consulted with companies catering to high-net worth individuals. I helped them design sales and business strategies to keep their clients happy in the short and long term. Needless to say, the luxury sector was massacred, and is still clawing its way out of the muck and mire, at least in the United States.

So, with enough money to float for six to ten months, I kept looking for work in my field.

And looking, and looking … nothing.

Any kind of business consulting … nothing (six more months go by).

Any kind of sales … nothing (six more months … this was where it got scary).

Waiting tables, bar-tending, limo driving, grocery bagging … ANYTHING!

Nope.

Bear in mind that up until this point, I had never even gone a month without a job since I was 12 years old.

My confidence was shot – I mean decimated. I was a shell of the man I had been only two years previously.

I had the stink of failure all over me.

A friend of mine owned a couple of car-washes. He offered me a job. It was outside work, taking orders when people drove in to the wash. “Would you like the undercarriage done?”

It was winter in Colorado

I declined.

I was sharing a huge house at the time with my best buddy and his new girlfriend, who became his fiancé, and we were ALL broke. It was brutal. I don’t think I would have made it without them. I was depressed and miserable. I’m lucky they didn’t bury me in a snow bank and leave me there. I’m sure there were times they wanted to.

“Cocky” doesn’t do failure well.

My buddy with the car-wash called again a few weeks later. I said no again. Not just because of the embarrassment. Not just because of the cold weather and the elements, or standing on my feet for 10 hours a day on concrete without Wi-Fi.

It was because of my father.

Almost every good father has a catch phrase that he uses to motivate his sons to do better than he did. Typically, it’s the threat of being stuck doing any minimum-wage job that no teenager from the Gekko era would ever aspire to. For some reason, the example that my father chose was “car wash”. We’d go through Towne Auto Wash after Little League and he’d always point to that guy who asks, “Do you want a regular wash, or deluxe?” and then hands you that little piece of paper.

“Mickey” He’d say. “You have to save some money/get better grades/quit chasing girls/do your homework. You don’t want to end up like that guy, working in a car-wash, do you?” The last time I heard the speech was around 1996. The words, however, hung in the air for years to come.

So, you can see my quandary. To me, working in a car-wash was the ultimate admission of failure. Not losing all my assets. Not selling my watches and cars. Not letting go of a few rugs and some art.

I was living with friends, driving a 17-year-old car, had less than $200 in the bank with no idea where the next $200 was coming from, and I was worried about being seen as a failure.

A little deluded?

Perhaps, but reality kicked in when I didn’t have money for a niece’s birthday present.

So I called my friend back and asked if I could still have the job at the car-wash. My utter failure as a human being was complete, my humiliation final -or so I thought.

On my third day of dragging myself in to work, the raven-haired stunner that I’d hired as my assistant five years previous pulled in – driving a brand new Lexus.

NOW my humiliation was complete.

There was nowhere to run, no place to hide.

And yet … just as I was about to die from shame, something happened that literally changed my life. She smiled, jumped out of her car, pointed her Louboutins right at me, ran over and gave me a hug. We chatted for about 10 minutes while her car was getting done. She said she was happy to see me, that I’d been a great boss, and that she was glad I was working. “Sooooo many” of her friends(able-bodied twenty-somethings) were unemployed, and at least I wasn’t trapped behind a desk.

I realized that I’d been beating myself up needlessly, and saw how lucky I truly was.

In that instant, I decided that instead of just showing up until I could find something better, I would use all my skills to increase my friend’s business, and I did. Over the next few months, something amazing happened to me. Something I never saw coming, and something that impacted my life and made me a better man.

I saw hundreds of people every day and none of them thought I was a failure, and it energized me. I smiled. They smiled back. I was happy and engaging, and I sold about a gazillion deluxe washes. But also, my worst fear morphed into something I started to look forward to. I got my confidence back, and it was obvious. I saw DOZENS of people I knew – clients, old customers, friends I’d lost touch with, and every single one of them said something positive.

They respected me.

They held me in higher esteem for seeing me in the cold, wearing a red nylon jacket with a car wash logo on it. Nobody made fun of me or called me names. Nobody laughed.

There was even an article in a local lifestyle magazine about me.

They respected me for doing what had to be done (I’m sure a few were secretly happy that I’d been taken down a few pegs … but hey, we’re all human, right?)

The truth of my situation was laid bare for the world to see … there’s no way to spin a story when you are asking people if they want the basic or deluxe wash. There’s no amount of charm of polish or bullshit that can hide the truth.

I was working in a car wash – and nobody thought I was a failure. Not even my father.

Then, about 6 months later, one of my old clients called. He needed some help setting up a new luxury club. We put a deal together and when I resigned from the car-wash, my friend was genuinely sad, saying I was the best employee he’d ever had.

I approached that new consulting contract with a vigor and zest for life I hadn’t felt for years! A few months after that, another contract took me to Asia, and I’ve been consulting over here ever since.

So, my worst fear turned out to be my salvation.

It gave me confidence, paid my bills for a while and put me in a position to move my company to Asia and have access to an abundance of new cultures and growing markets.

Sure, I’m not quite back to where I was that day 9 years ago in Vegas, but I have a red nylon jacket with a car wash logo on it that reminds me that for my version of success, I don’t have to be.

– Michael Aumock

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Video of the last 9/11 search and rescue dog, Bretagne (pronounced “Brittany”) walking into the vet’s office for the last time with a hero’s salute. She would have turned 17 in August

The Patent Scam 

When you have the day off

1100lb brown bear going into hibernation in Finland

HBO Boxing’s Muhammad Ali Tribute

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We Can’t Get Enough of Kristina Basham on Instagram – Maxim

Adorable 2-Year-Old Triplets Are Best Friends With Their Garbage Men – Ned Hardy

28 Hilarious Pictures Literally All Parents Can Relate To – Linkiest

Axl Rose Trying to Erase ‘Fat Photo’ From Internet – Newser

Ariel Winter and Her Booty Cheeks Back on Set – G-Celeb

How to Become Magnetic: A Guide to Charm and Charisma – Nick Notas

Charlotte McKinney Monster Clown Bewbs in a Bikini – Drunken Stepfather

Why Do the Poor Make Such Poor Decisions? – Medium

Game of Thrones Scenes You Should’ve Paid More Attention To – Ranker

These girls don’t need no stinkin bras – Radass

New Viral Craze #BoobLuge Challenge Is the Dumbest Thing I’ve Seen in at Least Three Days – The Blemish

These Japanese High Schoolers Just Did Something That Scientists Have Never Been Able To Achieve – Slip Talk

44 Mesmerizing Pics of Shailene Woodley – Regretful Morning

Deshauna Barber is your new Miss USA – Celeb Slam

I’m sure a little sideboob can cure the 9-5 blues (30 Photos) – Bad Sentinel

An Inside Look at Nike CEO Mark Parker’s Classy Office (HQ) – Classy Bro

The Best Cosplay of Niagara Falls Comicon 2016 – Double Viking

Smoking hot selfshot of the day (nsfw) – Ehowa

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Instagram

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Brutal Muay Thai Leg Kicks

Pure and utter annihilation of brain cells

The video that set the internet on fire…R.I.P Kimbo

 Muhammad Ali dodging 21 punches in 10 seconds

LET ME BANG BRO

Dude Fights Off 4 Guys Trying To Jump Him!

Muhammad Ali vs Cleveland Williams 1966

Kids have insane fight in a bathroom

Bully punches blind kid and then gets his ass beat

Bouncer KO’s annoying guy

“I was at the club last weekend. This kid who was previously kicked out kept asking the bouncer to punch him in the face to let him back in the club and eventually the bouncer obliged and knocked him out."

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